ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You'll never get on the property ladder.
The only plot you'll ever own is two metres deep, and there's a waiting list.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- Your partner says they'd be lost without you. They'd be lost for about eighteen…
- Roblox was free. The hat was £4.99. The sword was “everyone has one”.
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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