ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment".
It took you three days to reply "thanks".
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm. It…
- Your backlog is a library of things you were going to enjoy. It is…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You can't take money with you when you go. Your direct debits, however, will…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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