ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You negotiated your broadband bill down by $3 a month.
The call took 94 minutes. You break even in 2031. They put it back up in 2027.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- The best time to start saving was twenty years ago. The second-best time was…
- Your complaint has been escalated. It is now ignored by someone more senior.
- Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing. When you…
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Mistakes were made. Nobody made them. They just happened, like weather.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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