ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Fortnite was free to play.
It was not free to stop.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "chronically online". Chronic means long-term. You've been online so long your eyes have…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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