ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The return to office is completely optional.
So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet there you are, ranked 41st. They're "reviewing" 41st.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- “I'm here for the right reasons.” The reasons are a teeth-whitening deal and a…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- Mistakes were made. Nobody made them. They just happened, like weather.
- Your banking app pauses slightly before opening. It's deciding how to tell you.
- Step outside your comfort zone. It's raining out there, everything costs more, and nobody…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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