ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Monday morning has the energy of a printer that knows you're in a hurry.
The printer has better job security.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Tomorrow is a fresh start. Your problems have the new address. They've already moved…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- A source close to the star confirmed the story. The source is the star.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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