ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The in-office lunch is optional.
The man with the clipboard and no sandwich is writing down who didn't come. Then who did, but looked replaceable.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be yourself. Everyone else is taken. They were picked first. You're what was left.
- Mondays aren't so bad. They're just Sundays that opened their bank statement.
- Nobody notices when you do your job well. Everyone notices when you leave at…
- The bins are now fortnightly. The council tax is still monthly.
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You "grew out of" your old friends. They grew out of waiting for you…
- There's someone out there for everyone. Yours married someone else in 2019. They look…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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