ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your back now goes out when you sneeze.
It goes out more than you do.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- Your partner says they'd be lost without you. They'd be lost for about eighteen…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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