ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 18 AUGUST 1964
Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams
than you've had about anything since 2011.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Till death do us part. Not a vow. A fixed-term contract with an unspecified…
- When you're gone, the one who misses you most will be the algorithm. It…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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