ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You swore you'd never sound like your parents.
You just said "because I said so" in your dad's exact voice. He lives in you now.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Work smarter, not harder. You've chosen neither, and HR has a folder.
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
- Early access means you paid to watch someone not finish something. You do that…
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Your toddler has stronger opinions about sock seams than you've had about anything since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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