ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 4 AUGUST 1964
Age is just a number.
So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than your salary.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- Listen to your body. It's asking for a biscuit and a lie-down. It's been…
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- They're on a comeback tour. It's the fourth. They have never been anywhere long…
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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