ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
A budget is a list of things you're about to do anyway.
Written down first, so the guilt has paperwork.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "manifesting abundance". The only thing abundant is your payment reminders.
- Nobody has ever said "thank goodness it's Monday". Except a manager, and he meant…
- You got the ick because they ran for a bus. You've been single three…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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