ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Wildflowering means letting the relationship grow naturally, with no timeline.
It has the growth rate of a fern in a windowless bathroom, and about the same future.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
- Your partner says they'd be lost without you. They'd be lost for about eighteen…
- Mistakes were made. The Notes app has never once said by whom.
- Age is just a number. So is your cholesterol, and it's climbing faster than…
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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