ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your desk plant is the only thing in the office still growing.
When you leave, someone will fight over the plant.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The award show ran four hours. The only winner was the advert break.
- You said you're "built different". You're built the same. Just assembled worse.
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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