ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You typed "speak to an agent" nine times.
The bot sent you a help article about speaking to agents. The agents were let go in March.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Unlimited holiday is a lovely policy. The company did the maths on your guilt,…
- The retirement age goes up a year every time you check. It's not a…
- Children are a blessing. They're also why the remote is in the bin and…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- The loot box has a 0.5% chance of something good. The studio has a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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