ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Some people run marathons.
You run late, and you still come last.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Skipping your daily coffee won't buy you a house. Nothing will. Have the coffee.
- Your backlog is a library of things you were going to enjoy. It is…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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