ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands.
It will be the most productive minute of the quarter.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right. Investors loved it. The…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Every birthday is a gift. The gift is one fewer birthday.
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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