ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 9 JUNE 1979
Parenting is ten percent love
and ninety percent asking where the other shoe is. Then they leave and take both.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The weekend is two days long. Monday is nine emotional days long, and you're…
- Your job title will outlive you. It's already been posted on LinkedIn, with a…
- You're not broke. You're pre-rich. The "pre" is permanent.
- You left them on read "to be mysterious". They didn't notice. They were also…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You've been "circling back" since March. At this point you're space debris.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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