ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 27 APRIL 1980
Some people run marathons.
You run late, and you still come last.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your Candy Crush streak is on day 212. The game hasn't been fun since…
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- Wealth is built slowly. Debt is built quickly. And it's hereditary.
- Love yourself first. Someone has to, and nobody else applied.
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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