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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION MONDAY, 19 NOVEMBER 1984
Romance isn't dead.
It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from 2022.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
  2. Your company will send flowers to your funeral. They'll be charged to your department's…
  3. You've rewritten that text nine times to sound like you didn't care. It's been…
  4. Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
  5. Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
  6. Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
  7. Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 446

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