ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every relationship has a honeymoon period.
Yours was the walk from the bar to the taxi rank. She got in alone.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Limited-time event. Will not return. Neither will your Saturday.
- Kids grow up so fast. Except between 5pm and bedtime, when time stops and…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- Disrupt the industry. The industry will disrupt you back, then buy your logo for…
- Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad. The…
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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