ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
TUESDAY, 15 AUGUST 1989
Every great company started in a garage.
Yours will end there too. The car's been living outside since launch.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- You "love deeply". Mostly a fictional man who doesn't know you exist. Neither do…
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- Your step counter used to set goals. Now it just sends "Hello?" like a…
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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