ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You have a "5-year plan".
It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your 47 open tabs are an accurate map of your inner life. Someone will…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- When life gives you lemons, it sends the invoice later. With interest.
- Your teenager isn't ignoring everyone. Just you. You're saved in their phone as "Do…
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Growing old is mandatory. Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later.…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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