ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
They posted an apology in the Notes app.
It was addressed to the fans. The person they hurt didn't get a screenshot.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your squad misses you, says the notification. Your squad is four strangers and a…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question". Zack has…
- Every summit sends a very strong signal. The planet keeps not receiving it.
- Sleep when the baby sleeps. Also pay the mortgage when the baby pays the…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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