ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark.
There wasn't. She knew in four minutes. You paid for both.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Remember when you stayed up late on purpose? Now you're up at 3am because…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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