ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SATURDAY, 9 JUNE 1990
You've been "about to start the gym" since January.
It's October. The gym has had two owners and a refurb in the time you've been about to.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- Teamwork makes the dream work. It also means six people are ready to blame…
- The house will be tidy again one day. The day they move out. Tidy,…
- Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January. It's been screaming…
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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