ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle.
The kettle will outlast the excitement. Possibly you.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
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- Your fitness app's AI coach called a four-minute walk "incredible progress". It said the…
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- Love is patient. Your partner is not, and has started a note on their…
- You started a podcast with your mate “for a laugh”. Episode 31 has nine…
- You said you "thrive in a fast-paced environment". It took you three days to…
- 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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