ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad.
The news is still bad. Your eyes are warmer. So is your overdraft.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Every company now has an AI assistant. It's the only member of staff nobody's…
- Quality family time: everyone on a different screen in the same room, harvested by…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You asked the chatbot if you were a good parent. It said "absolutely" before…
- Hard work pays off eventually. It's paying off right now. Your boss just bought…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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