ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your financial advisor is a spreadsheet you opened once in January.
It's been screaming quietly ever since.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You'll leave your children everything you have. It's mostly a bread maker and an…
- You went "no contact" with your ex. You still check their Spotify. They're listening…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- You received 40 fundraising texts today. Democracy needs $5 by midnight. Every midnight.
- You're "healing your inner child". Your inner child is fine. It's your outer adult…
- Both parties say this is the most important election of your lifetime. They said…
- You said "this is my year". You've said it since 2019. The years have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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