ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 2 JANUARY 1994
You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move.
Your audience is very engaged. Just not with lifting a sofa.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have 47 tabs open. Three are jobs you'll never apply for, one's a…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- You're "in your villain era". You returned a lukewarm coffee and apologised four times.…
- Compound interest is the eighth wonder of the world. Your overdraft found it first.…
- Unlimited holiday is a lovely policy. The company did the maths on your guilt,…
- Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark. There wasn't. She…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 446
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