ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your chatbot calls every one of your ideas "a really insightful question".
Zack has read your ideas. Zack would like them escorted from the building.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The battle pass costs £9.99 a season. Your childhood cost nothing and had better…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Your call is important to us. Not important enough to answer, but important.
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- You said "my For You page knows me so well". It knows you're awake…
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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