ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Micro-dating is a thirty-minute coffee to see if there's a spark.
There wasn't. She knew in four minutes. You paid for both.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You have a "5-year plan". It's a Pinterest board. It's mostly kitchens.
- Your soft launch was a hand in a photo. The hard launch never came.…
- He vanished for five months, then texted "haha so true" like he'd just popped…
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- Your therapist said set boundaries. You set one. Then texted them at 2 a.m.…
- Dating apps let you meet hundreds of people. All of them are "just seeing…
- Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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