ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The return to office is completely optional.
So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet there you are, ranked 41st. They're "reviewing" 41st.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You don't have a spending problem. You have an income problem, and it's terminal.
- You said you'd "touch grass" this weekend. You took a photo of grass, posted…
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You reinstalled Pokémon Go to get your steps up. Eleven kilometres later you'd caught…
- You've "romanticised your life". It's a candle, a croissant and a playlist called "main…
- Opposites attract. Then they argue about the thermostat for forty years. Whoever outlives the…
- You've got a side hustle, a passion project and a podcast. Combined monthly income:…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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