ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
SUNDAY, 29 DECEMBER 1996
You say you're "an old soul".
You're 21. The only old thing about you is your phone's battery health.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your business plan has three phases: launch, pivot, and letting the domain quietly expire.
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- Your resting heart rate is excellent. It's had nothing else to do.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- Wisdom comes with age. So does standing on the landing with no idea why…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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