ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You moneymaxxed so hard this month you earned $4.80 in cashback.
It cost three new cards and a Sunday. You get roughly 4,000 Sundays. That was one.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Coffee doesn't fix Monday. It just makes sure you're fully conscious for it.
- You deleted the app "for good". That was 40 minutes ago. You've reinstalled it…
- Monday motivation is a myth. Like the Loch Ness Monster, a clean office microwave,…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- Your business plan has three phases: launch, pivot, and letting the domain quietly expire.
- You say you're "an old soul". You're 21. The only old thing about you…
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
One quote. Every morning. Delivered before coffee, when you are weakest and the day has not yet had the chance to disappoint you itself.
No spam. Just disappointment. Unsubscribe whenever you regain hope.