ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You "can't do mornings".
You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You said "that's so me" about a horoscope. It also described 600 million other…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- "It's just a phase" is a phrase you'll say for eighteen years. You're the…
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Money can't buy happiness. You'll never have enough to check.
- True love is choosing the same person every day. They're choosing, daily, whether to…
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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