ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 13 MAY 1999
You don't skip leg day.
You skip every day. The legs know. The legs are keeping a list.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You are a valued member of the team. So was the last person in…
- You're not getting older. You're getting closer. That's worse.
- Rise and grind. Your teeth have been grinding all night. Your dentist bought a…
- Romance isn't dead. It just stopped waiting for a reply to your "hey" from…
- You "don't do small talk". You also don't do big talk, phone calls, emails…
- You started saying "oof" when you sit down. That's the countdown, out loud.
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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