ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
THURSDAY, 11 NOVEMBER 1999
Doom spending is buying a heated eye mask because the news was bad.
The news is still bad. Your eyes are warmer. So is your overdraft.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- It's not a career ladder. It's a hamster wheel. The hamster has a LinkedIn…
- Your savings account isn't empty. It's a memorial.
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- You'll never get on the property ladder. The only plot you'll ever own is…
- Synergy is two departments confused about the same thing at once. They'll merge. You'll…
- The first email you open on Monday is a reply-all from Friday. Forty replies.…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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