ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You've been "about to start the gym" since January.
It's October. The gym has had two owners and a refurb in the time you've been about to.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- They say sweat is weakness leaving the body. Yours has decided to stay.
- The spark never fades. It gets downgraded to bin bags, then to a joint…
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- Being a parent means eating cold crusts standing up and calling it dinner. You'll…
- Your favourite music is now called "a classic". So are you. It means old.
- You spent £400 on an ergonomic chair. You sit on it like a frog.…
- You said you're "so busy" this week. Your screen time says eleven hours a…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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