ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
“Too close to call” means nobody knows.
It is said by people paid a lot to know.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You call yourself "a bit of a foodie". You've ordered the same chicken 64…
- Ghostlighting is when someone disappears for eight weeks and comes back with "you've been…
- You swore you'd never sound like your parents. You just said "because I said…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- You have a "comfort show". You've watched it 11 times. You've seen your friends…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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