ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your soft launch was a hand in a photo.
The hard launch never came. The hand has since soft-launched someone else.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- The consultation runs for twelve weeks. The decision was made in week zero.
- You're not a CEO. You're one person with a logo, a free email account…
- Don't settle. Your standards already have. They didn't tell you.
- Someone laminated an "Acceptable Behaviour" poster for the office kitchen. It will still be…
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
- Your soulmate is out there. Currently leaving someone better on read.
- You pre-ordered it for the cape. The cape is now £3.99 for everyone else.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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