ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
The light at the end of the tunnel is someone asking, "Can you see my screen?"
You can. You always will.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You've "been meaning to" for three years. The thing you meant to do has…
- Fortnite was free to play. It was not free to stop.
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
- The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. You took it…
- "Per my last email" is the closest you'll ever get to a duel. You'll…
- You call your mum "for advice". You call her for the Netflix password.
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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