ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Loud budgeting is telling everyone you can't afford brunch.
Quiet budgeting is going anyway, checking your balance in the car and moving retirement to 79.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Every parent has a favourite child. It's whichever one isn't currently talking.
- "We should get dinner sometime" is a beautiful promise. One of you will die…
- You're ageing like a fine wine. Expensive, slightly sour, best kept in the dark,…
- Treat yourself, they said. You did. Four times before lunch. Your pension felt every…
- Your gym membership is the most expensive guilt you've ever bought. It renews automatically.…
- You manifested your dream job. The universe received the request, checked your CV and…
- You got a houseplant to "take care of something". It died. Even the plant…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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