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ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED

DAILY DEMOTIVATION

A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.

ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION THURSDAY, 4 DECEMBER 2003
Growing old is mandatory.
Growing up was optional. You ticked "later". This is later. Nothing happened.

— Zack, unqualified

VERIFIED
UNHELPFUL

PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE

  1. The return to office is completely optional. So was the badge-swipe leaderboard, and yet…
  2. Beach body ready? The beach has been ready for four billion years. It isn't…
  3. You can do anything you set your mind to. Your mind has set itself…
  4. You're "on a gap year". It's your third.
  5. Your company's core values are printed on the wall. So nobody has to have…
  6. 2026 is the new 2016. Your knees did not get the memo. Your knees…
  7. The update is 200GB. Your free afternoon was smaller.

THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR

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Newsletter / Issue No. 445

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