ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You started saying "oof" when you sit down.
That's the countdown, out loud.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You're "taking a social media break". You announced it on social media. Twice. With…
- You hyped your mate's mixtape. You've never listened to it. Neither has anyone. Including…
- Inside every older person is a younger person. The younger person is furious about…
- Everyone's bringing back the dog filter. Your face has been doing the droopy-ears look…
- You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to…
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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