ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You call it a "situationship" because "relationship" would mean someone has to commit to something.
They haven't. They've committed to watching your stories within four seconds and replying to nothing.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Being single means nobody steals your duvet. It also means the duvet is the…
- A good night out now means home by ten. Nobody had to come and…
- Monday is a perfectly normal day. You've got about two thousand more of them.…
- You have 2,000 followers and nobody to help you move. Your audience is very…
- You've "found your aesthetic". It's beige. It's always beige.
- You "romanticise studying". You've filmed it, lit it and soundtracked it. You haven't studied.
- You're "so random". You've told the same "so random" story at every party since…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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