ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Your startup is a chatbot that tells customers they're right.
Investors loved it. The chatbot told them they would. Then it told them to replace you with it. Very persuasive.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- "It's only Monday" is the most threatening sentence in English. It will be only…
- Your friends' group chat went quiet. It didn't. They made a new one. Same…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- You typed "speak to an agent" nine times. The bot sent you a help…
- They'll hold a minute's silence for you at the all-hands. It will be the…
- Consistency is key. You've said "I'll go tomorrow" for three years. It's the only…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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