ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
ARCHIVED DEMOTIVATION
MONDAY, 25 AUGUST 2008
You are exactly where you're meant to be.
That should frighten you more than it does.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
- Be your own boss. Your new boss naps at 2pm, can't pay you, and…
- You've been "about to start the gym" since January. It's October. The gym has…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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