ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
You put "entrepreneur" in your bio.
You've sold one pair of trainers on Vinted and still owe your mum for the postage.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- Youth is wasted on the young. You wasted yours too. Old age is next,…
- You are exactly where you're meant to be. That should frighten you more than…
- Your 5am routine went viral. You did it once, filmed it, and have slept…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- You wanted a mini-me. You got a tiny negotiator who has never once lost…
- Your Duolingo owl has stopped threatening you. It's not proud. It's given up. Even…
- You quit your job to "find yourself". Found you. You're on your parents' sofa,…
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
SEND ME ONE DEPRESSING THOUGHT EVERY MORNING
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