ISSUED DAILY SINCE NOBODY ASKED
DAILY DEMOTIVATION
A fresh disappointment every morning. Like the news, but more honest.
Every birthday is a gift.
The gift is one fewer birthday.
— Zack, unqualified
VERIFIEDUNHELPFUL
PREVIOUSLY, ON YOUR DECLINE
- You sent "lol" to avoid having feelings. It worked. You feel nothing, said nothing,…
- No pain, no gain. You chose neither. Your heart has noted it in your…
- Nothing says adulthood like being excited about a new kettle. The kettle will outlast…
- You "can't do mornings". You also can't do afternoons, evenings or emails.
- Your out-of-office reply is the most confident thing you wrote all year. Nobody noticed…
- Running clears your head. Mostly of the idea that you're a runner.
- You "speak your truth". Your truth is mostly about the bin rota.
THE CALENDAR OF DESPAIR
Newsletter / Issue No. 445
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